This is a book I would truly rather not have the knowledge or experience to write. It is a recounting of a terrible time in my life and in truth, I would much prefer to have lived my life void of this understanding. This book represents an eleven year battle for justice. My experience with this terrible false accusation has served as the catalyst for this book and hopefully it will be instructive for those who read it.
It is important to acknowledge the purpose, or rather the purposes, I am attempting to accomplish with the publication of this book. And, at different times and in different situations, the priority of the purpose changes. Specifically, this book is for:
NB: The 6 points are explained in more detail in Chapter 59, The lessons to be learned.
- People who have been falsely accused. Treat this book as a guide to help more effectively understand and deal with the difficult period of time you will have confronting the false accusation. This book is designed to help the falsely accused person make informed choices early in the false accusation process and of equal importance, to subsequently help the person understand some of the emotional, physical and financial changes that will occur over the days, months and years ahead.
- Families of those accused of sexual assault. This book is designed to help the family (and close friends) understand the terribly devastating emotional roller coaster the falsely accused person will be on for the duration of the accusatory process and unfortunately, for the rest of their lives. And of critical importance, to help everyone better understand the fragile nature of the accused person while providing insights, encouragement and support, so the person does not succumb to a devastating depression which could translate into a debilitating morass . . or worse . . as difficult as it is to say; suicide. More on this in the book.
- Managers, owners, corporate executives, or anyone who is investigating or supervising the investigators of sexual impropriety. This book will help understand the need to treat the accuser and the accused with equal consideration; to not jump to conclusions. This book is for the person who may be faced with the issue of an accusation within their organization, and following an 'investigation', must make fair, compassionate, morally correct, non political and legally defensible decisions. To be clear, it is critically important to investigate all accusations in a sincere, dedicated, sensitive, objective and non political manner to determine the truth.
- Lawyers and Judges who are designated to either facilitate or to make the decision regarding accusations. This book will assist to understand the need to not only provide competent, timely and superior legal counsel, but as well to treat all parties, in this case, especially the falsely accused with respect, dignity and with a 'customer focus' attitude. Additionally, this book is for all judicial practitioners, (lawyers representing the plaintiff and the defendant, masters, clerical/administration staff, judges) who have much to learn about managing their 'offices' and especially about dealing with the falsely accused. In fact, the manner with which the legal profession 'handles' the falsely accused will play a large part in how that person is able to cope with the terrible accusation. The manner of processing 'the case' from the first consultative visit, up to and including the final judgment, deserves skill, dedication and sensitivity. The falsely accused person is in a depressive frame of mind, that the legal practitioners must provide an accurate, timely, competent and compassionate legal process.
- Media (interviewers, writers, editors) assigned to report on the accusation and the trial (if applicable), as well as any follow-up articles. This book will assist to understand the need to treat all parties with more respect and dignity and to encourage a more balanced and fair report. This book will demonstrate the repercussions from reporting only the salacious details with attention grabbing headlines, irrespective of what is truth and what is fact and, to understand the tactics of lawyers vying for a 'slanted' story. Reporting the truth, in a fair and balanced manner is critical.
- Those who have, or are contemplating falsely accusing someone of sexual impropriety. This book will demonstrate the devastation caused by the false accusation. It is extremely important to understand the incredible devastation you will, or already have, invoked on that innocent person. And don't be influenced by the outward appearance of the falsely accused. While you may believe their demeanor indicates rational and thoughtful actions, it is the turmoil inside that you do not see. It is the terrible embarrassment, shame and diminished self worth, that comes with the accusation, that people may not see. It is the shattered career, the loss of friends and society's failure to believe the falsely accused person that eats away at the person and in some cases, takes them over the edge. I encourage false accusers to get help immediately. Simply stated; Just Don't do it!
This book has also taken on the characteristics of a Business Book, with many examples of situations and circumstances which I faced in my business career and details how I went about successfully addressing those matters. I personally feel there is much to be gained from sharing my twenty seven years in the automotive industry and especially the final years in senior executive capacities both in the Personnel and Manufacturing areas. Particularly noteworthy is the assignments as Divisional Director of Labour Relations for General Motors of Canada and my final position as Plant Manager of the General Motors Trim Plant in Windsor Ontario.
And finally, this book chronicles my efforts to dig myself out of the morass of the false accusation; to commence the process to regain my business and personal stature in the community and how I went about preparing for my new life, sans General Motors. The review of my recent business career, post GM, may have some key connections for other people who see themselves, or can somehow relate to my situation. I truly hope there will be lessons learned in that analysis.